Lusinda
by le fleur
Summary: So, what happened after Cinderella and the prince lived happily ever after?


LUSINDA, FORMERLY THE HELP

So, last time we chatted, I was Cinderella, stupid name. That was the stupid nickname that my stepmother and her daughters gave me. You remember right, went through hell, just to end up with Prince Charming "happily ever after." Well, I have news for you. It wasn't as happy as it seemed at the end of that story.

We get married, my stepmother, Gisella goes to jail for child abuse and my two stepsisters Gretchen and Joella went to a children's shelter. I took up my birth name again, Lusinda and moved in with my man. I drop the princess get up and go shopping. I don't remember how I became a blonde but after a while it was what color my hair was and living with Gisella, it was just dirty blonde anyways because it was always dirty, remember, I was always cleaning. I would wash it but I never had time to get it completely clean; I had to use bar soap. Either way, I go brunette and it fits me well. I love it. Next comes the castle. It's _huge_! I mean, Gisella's castle was alright, but his seemed to go on forever and there are servants all over the place and if I didn't have such a hard time finding my way around this maze of a house I would be so fat from being oh so extremely lazy. If I asked these servants to wipe my ass they would (but I don't, that's disgusting!).

Our first night together, the servants come in covering the floor with flower petals and they lift me up and carry me off to a tub of hot water filled with more flower petals and very nice smelling oils. It's all so great that I close my eyes. When I open them there's Mr. Charming in the tub waiting on me! All I can do is smile. They lower me in and right when I'm leaning forward to kiss him he says, "Hey, um…could you wash me?" "What?" "Well, I've never washed myself. Mummy and daddy always made sure that there was a beautiful maid here for that. But now, you're my wife and well, now, it's your job." Simple as that. He didn't stutter or hesitate in saying it and he was serious! I just stand up and get out of the tub. I put a robe on and get the hell out. I don't know how I get there but I end up on the other side of the castle in a very beautiful room lined with nothing but a huge mural depicting the night sky turning into day on one side and windows on the other. There are pillows of various colors all over the floor. I simply plop down on whichever ones my bottom finds and too pissed to weep, I watch the sun set.

I wake up to a soft shaking and my name being whispered in my ear, "Lusinda." When I open my eyes he's stooping (with two women steadying him) next to me with a hand on my shoulder and an almost sincere look in his eyes. "It's almost sunrise. You've been gone for hours, and I couldn't find you. After my bath, my hair being oiled and combed, and my dinner, I realized that you hadn't come back." I give him a blank stare. He gives me what he thinks is a genuine look of concern. I roll my eyes and walk away, where I'm headed, I don't know. He runs after me. "Come on, let's talk. We need to get to know each other. I mean, we are husband and wife…" I stop walking and agree. He walks me to his "office" where there is a huge picture of him in the center of the wall, one of his father to the left, and one of his mother to the right. It really creeps me out. "Sit down." I sit on a velvet covered bench and try to appear comfortable. He smiles. I stare at him. His smile fades and he proceeds to try to make me feel as much like Mrs. Prince Charming as I should. "So, you used to be a peasant in the ghetto, huh?" is his first question. "My parents were murdered, and I was orphaned." I answer through gritted teeth. He still has that stupid grin on his face. "So, you what's your real name?" "Real name? What do you mean?" "My name is Lusinda O'hare. What is your real name?" Still no answer, only a blank stare. "And how old were your sisters?" DID I EVEN ASK A QUESTION? "Joella was twelve and Gretchen was fourteen. So you mean to tell me that your mother named you Prince Charming, is that what you are telling me?" "Yes." "I'm going to bed." "But you just woke up." "I don't care." He follows me out of the room and all through the palace pleading with me. "Why are you being such a….a…bitch?" is what I heard clearly and that is when I turned around and punched him in the face. He fell backwards tripping over a rug on the floor and into the huge mirror that hung on the wall. His yell echoes and echoes and echoes for a really long time. There was total silence at first and then I hear running. The sound was coming from the mirror. In total shock I stand there just watching as Prince Charming reappears smacking into the glass from the other side. I try but fail at stifling a laugh. He just didn't appear so charming anymore. "Help me! Get me out of here." I just stare. He starts weeping. Then I saw it. There were little hands grabbing at his face and arms. There were these little Prince Charmings, fairy sized pulling at him in all directions. "Hi handsome," "Wow, you are gorgeous!" Some rubbed his hair, and some even kissed him. It was crazy. Prince Charming literally fell in love with himself thanks to his love of his own reflection in the mirror.

After the mirror incident, I was, well technically a widow after being married all of two days, but I wasn't sad. I got a map made of the castle and started finding my way around the house. Mr. Charming whined on and on from inside the mirror. It was amusement for my friends for a while, and then I took it down and put it in the basement. When his mother came looking for him, I had to tell her the truth so I showed her the mirror and she took it back to her castle weeping all the way, but they seemed content together. I haven't remarried. It's cool. Here in Fairytale Towne, things tend to go completely downhill for us girls after we marry. The storybooks always end happily, but does anyone ever ask, well, what happened next? But he's with the woman he loves and I'm in this wonderful castle that as we speak is being made over to my liking. My best friends Lizz, formerly Snow White, who's discovered the goth scene, and Alice (remember, from Wonderland?) who's a terrible acid queen now, but we love her all the same, live with me. We each have our own wing to do as we like and on Saturdays, we have our "grrrrrls night out." It's pretty rockin'… I guess we all got our happily ever after…for now!


End file.
